I've just caught air of a hard hitting news story that I found quite humorous, while a little frightening. Apparently, a young man had gotten the impression that he was going to rob a bank; I'm assuming because he felt it was both easier than working for it and that he might feel as cool as a movie star would in a heist movie. Anyway, the scheme became absolutely untangled when he put on a ski mask and arrived on the scene only to discover that the bank was at it's busy peak time and the line was longer than usual. Wanting to be polite and courteous, as bank robbers usually are, the young man went to the back of the line to wait his turn. Customers, employees and security guards became suspicious that the young man is up to no good when he continued to wear the ski mask hiding his identity as he stood in line. The police were called and the career criminal was quickly taken into custody.

That's funny right? Now, I was a little frightened about this little event because of the obvious lower standards of quality in the American Educational System, but instead of wax political, I'll state what this young man should have done instead.

This man was in need of money, hence, the silly plan to rob a bank. Perhaps in place of such a plan, he could have borrowed a nice suit from a friend (hopefully not all of his friends are hopeless inept bank robbers), find a handful of money to buy the waffle maker above at a bargain price, strolled into the bank with a smile and ask for the Manager. As he waits for the Manager he speaks privately to one of the Bank Guards and secretly hands him a ten dollar bill (the friend that let him borrow the suit and the money is a good friend). Once he was allowed to have a meet and greet with the Manager of the bank he would shake his hand, smile, and begin the conversation with…

"You know what's on my mind?"

"No, I don't." The Manager replies, "what is on your mind?"

"Syrup."

"Syrup?"

This is when the young man would pull a bottle of delicious maple syrup from his coat pocket and showcase it to the Manager.

"Yes, syrup," the young man says, holding it up. "Do you like syrup?"

"Yes," says the Manager with surprise, "I love syrup."

"Good," the young man says as he steps aside just in time to see the Bank Guard place a plate of piping hot waffles on the Manager's desk.

"This is for me?" the Manager exclaims in surprise.

"It is," says the young man, "I'm glad you like syrup."

The Manager decides to use the syrup on the waffles, and, to her absolute delight, she confesses that she has never had a better breakfast. As she enjoys them the young man proposes a business plan of an elegant waffle house, which has been down before, but not with such delicacy, elegance and tastefulness. The Manager is so overwhelmed with joy that she approves a loan for the first five star waffle house, which was ironically named – Arrested Delight Waffles.

Irrelevant Media with a Bit of Relevancy
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